"Because no one else ever had." It's an echo of her own thoughts, a shared experience for all that the exact circumstances differed. "No one thought it worth bothering over." Not either of his mothers, not Professor Gast, the earliest memories of something like kindness he had. Not Vincent, trapped in a hell of his own. Not even Glenn, Matt and Lucia years later.
He'd given up on any thought of rescue long ago. But it had been a nice dream, a consolation even if it hadn't been real, let him muse now and again on how things might have been different, if it hadn't been just a dream. If someone else had been there, not afraid of him, willing to help, able to do the things he couldn't bring himself to do. Like kill the chief source of his torment. He couldn't even do that now.
It's still a dream. None of it was real, but it had been shared, those private faded childish hopes laid bare to someone else. It had been strange and wonderful, even for a little while, to be able to rely on another. To feel safe, to believe even for a little while things might be okay.
After a long moment he shakes his head a little in an effort to shake the thought off too. "It ...." A breath. Steady. "It doesn't matter now. At best, maybe in some reality or other there is ... another you, and another me, and things went differently." Alternate realities can be so close to the ones already known, like Zack appearing twisted by Jenova but still having the right relic for the one Sephiroth knew. "Don't let it bother you." Or bother himself, for that matter. It might shake the tenuous peace he had with his upbringing and let wrath boil back up that it took a woman from an entirely different reality to be the first to even consider trying, and if even one did even in shared dream, maybe he didn't deserve everything that--
Sharon grimaces at his words, the mirror of her own thoughts, and it hits too close because she knows exactly how much it hurts. There's nothing worse than realizing the people who were supposed to care, the ones who should have cared, chose to look away. It shattered her as a child, just as it's shattering him now.
Her chest aches as she reaches out, resting a hand on his shoulder. She knows what he's doing—trying to shut down, to give her an easy way out—but she sees straight through it. She's done the same damn thing herself.
"Sephiroth, it will always bother me. I wish—" she stops, biting her lower lip hard, "I wish I could've changed things for you. But just because we can't rewrite your past doesn't mean we can't build you a better future." Even if that future only exists within Folkmore. "You deserve good things. Happiness. Love. Family. I know you don't believe it, but you do."
There's a tangible twitch, some reflexive urge to jerk back or prepare for attack that is squashed before it can go any further. It's always an unpleasant dichotomy, between being okay with contact, even wanting it badly sometimes, and the lessons of a lifetime in a lab.
It would be easier if she were angry. If he could provoke her into hostility and accusation, which given the things he'd done, the things he'd been doing, would be right and deserved.
Being tired of hostility over things he hadn't done was very different. He'd earned this.
"It doesn't matter if I do or not. You can see that, don't you? Even if I rewrite the future, even if I don't burn down that stupid little town, it's not going to give me my mother back, or a father, or..." Any of it. The planet would still be the planet, with the same people doing the same things. "..Or all the other things. Even the man I'm supposed to become was alone in the end, and he'd had friends. They left him. What chance do I have?"
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2025-09-22 02:30 am (UTC)He'd given up on any thought of rescue long ago. But it had been a nice dream, a consolation even if it hadn't been real, let him muse now and again on how things might have been different, if it hadn't been just a dream. If someone else had been there, not afraid of him, willing to help, able to do the things he couldn't bring himself to do. Like kill the chief source of his torment. He couldn't even do that now.
It's still a dream. None of it was real, but it had been shared, those private faded childish hopes laid bare to someone else. It had been strange and wonderful, even for a little while, to be able to rely on another. To feel safe, to believe even for a little while things might be okay.
After a long moment he shakes his head a little in an effort to shake the thought off too. "It ...." A breath. Steady. "It doesn't matter now. At best, maybe in some reality or other there is ... another you, and another me, and things went differently." Alternate realities can be so close to the ones already known, like Zack appearing twisted by Jenova but still having the right relic for the one Sephiroth knew. "Don't let it bother you." Or bother himself, for that matter. It might shake the tenuous peace he had with his upbringing and let wrath boil back up that it took a woman from an entirely different reality to be the first to even consider trying, and if even one did even in shared dream, maybe he didn't deserve everything that--
no subject
Date: 2025-09-26 11:10 pm (UTC)Her chest aches as she reaches out, resting a hand on his shoulder. She knows what he's doing—trying to shut down, to give her an easy way out—but she sees straight through it. She's done the same damn thing herself.
"Sephiroth, it will always bother me. I wish—" she stops, biting her lower lip hard, "I wish I could've changed things for you. But just because we can't rewrite your past doesn't mean we can't build you a better future." Even if that future only exists within Folkmore. "You deserve good things. Happiness. Love. Family. I know you don't believe it, but you do."
lurches upright ok
Date: 2025-10-04 12:03 am (UTC)It would be easier if she were angry. If he could provoke her into hostility and accusation, which given the things he'd done, the things he'd been doing, would be right and deserved.
Being tired of hostility over things he hadn't done was very different. He'd earned this.
"It doesn't matter if I do or not. You can see that, don't you? Even if I rewrite the future, even if I don't burn down that stupid little town, it's not going to give me my mother back, or a father, or..." Any of it. The planet would still be the planet, with the same people doing the same things. "..Or all the other things. Even the man I'm supposed to become was alone in the end, and he'd had friends. They left him. What chance do I have?"